So this friend of Mummy's called last, not to talk to Mummy, but to what? I have no earthly idea. She did manage to piss me off royally by asking me well, something that I won't share. I'm pretty sure that angering me wasn't her intent, but sometimes 'intention' and 'consequence' go in opposite directions. Raise your hand if you know what that's like!
So here's my little epiphany from the experience: there are lines in this caregiver business that people dance blithely over, with impunity. They do so, because we allow it. The first time, it's shame on them. The second, third, fourth and fiftieth times well that's on us. We don't pull them aside and say, "Hear nah (as we say in Trinidad), yuh (you) might want to check yuhself (yourself)."
It really wasn't a big thing. She just wanted to be sure that her friend was in good health. The fact that she was asking me about issues that I (i) haven't begun dealing with yet and (ii) don't wish to discuss with anyone outside my family, is, I suppose, my problem. Still though, more care really should be taken when trying to ascertain how a patient is doing without completely invading the caregiver's privacy or completely disregarding what all else the caregiver might be dealing with - including grief, anger, denial or as in my case, a cup of resentment that I struggle with. I'm trying valiantly not to allow said cup to run over. [A weird Psalm 23 reference if ever you heard one.]
In sum: sometimes folk just need to back up and think twice and twice again before they speak. That includes me. I am a WIP Christian - work in progress Christian - but I am still very much a human being and periodically, things will pop out of my jaw that should really have been taken captive. So it was with our inquisitive friend last night. Something popped out that ought not have.
As we say in Trinidad, even the longest rope has an end. Pushed too far or too hard, there could come a time when I just let myself go and set someone straight. It's been known to happen. Even Jesus blew a gasket a time or two. Let me offer the reminder that I am not perfect and I'm working under some pretty difficult conditions. Folks should govern themselves accordingly. Just sayin'.
So here's my little epiphany from the experience: there are lines in this caregiver business that people dance blithely over, with impunity. They do so, because we allow it. The first time, it's shame on them. The second, third, fourth and fiftieth times well that's on us. We don't pull them aside and say, "Hear nah (as we say in Trinidad), yuh (you) might want to check yuhself (yourself)."
It really wasn't a big thing. She just wanted to be sure that her friend was in good health. The fact that she was asking me about issues that I (i) haven't begun dealing with yet and (ii) don't wish to discuss with anyone outside my family, is, I suppose, my problem. Still though, more care really should be taken when trying to ascertain how a patient is doing without completely invading the caregiver's privacy or completely disregarding what all else the caregiver might be dealing with - including grief, anger, denial or as in my case, a cup of resentment that I struggle with. I'm trying valiantly not to allow said cup to run over. [A weird Psalm 23 reference if ever you heard one.]
In sum: sometimes folk just need to back up and think twice and twice again before they speak. That includes me. I am a WIP Christian - work in progress Christian - but I am still very much a human being and periodically, things will pop out of my jaw that should really have been taken captive. So it was with our inquisitive friend last night. Something popped out that ought not have.As we say in Trinidad, even the longest rope has an end. Pushed too far or too hard, there could come a time when I just let myself go and set someone straight. It's been known to happen. Even Jesus blew a gasket a time or two. Let me offer the reminder that I am not perfect and I'm working under some pretty difficult conditions. Folks should govern themselves accordingly. Just sayin'.
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